Discover the RVA Scene

Party Liberation Front (Podcast)
RVA Freaks
B.A.D.A.S.S. Raves
Source Productions Virginia
EVolve VA

Intermission

Before I am to go on my travels, I am held in limbo with my family.

Insecurities, self-doubt, and loneliness cloud my thoughts.

My family has been pushing me to do this and that, completely not respecting my decisions and preferences. They believe they know what's best for me, they believe they know what normal is. I ask for them to simply let me do my own thing.

I have also come to recognize my deep-seeded dependency in relationships.

More to add: "I truly appreciate the offer; however, I've already made plans to travel with my best friend, Mr. Blake Berky, to a few festivals myself. I certainly am not as strong of a woman as I appear to be either. While I am pretty damn good at taking care of business, I have a tendency to develop dependencies on my boyfriends that ends up allowing myself to get treated like shit and completely unappreciated.

That being said, the journey I'm about to embark on needs to be done emotionally solo - a quest to gain my independence from relationships as well as a quest for my own sense of spirituality, which I would like to derive without the use of hallucinogens. According to my latest Tarot Card reading, I will be successful in the end, but only as long as a be conscious of my path and the steps that I am taking."

Separation Anxiety

A focal change in my life.

A move.

A move towards breaking my barriers, a move towards experimentation, a move towards self-assurance.

I have been raised in conformity, I have been brought up to follow the law, to do well in school, to get a job, to have kids, to be appropriate, to be flexible and likable.

What happened to the rebellion I once had in my youth. Think back.

I know and want nonconformity. I know and want an alternative lifestyle. I want to be myself.

I want...

>>mind-altering<<

It is the root source of my jealousy - jealous of those that have no fear in being themselves.

<->->->->->->->->-<-<-<-<-<-<-<-<-<-<-<->->->->->->->

While I am on my own quest, I need to find comfort in the fact that my most closest friends are on the same quest and admire those that have taken that long journey.

<-<-<-<-<->->->->->->->->-<-<->-<->->->->->->->->-<->

It is strange to think that in a world of homogenization and a culture of individual suppresion, the counter-culture is equally competitive. Focus on the B A L A NC E and being G E N U I N E.

ENTER HERE

Whats next?

I will give myself some credit.

I have been doing extremely well with drinking my water, which has significantly made my skin clearer and has given me a boost of energy as well as kept my appetite under control.

I also have been running and trying to stay active - and although I did not run for about 2 weeks, I ran yesterday and forgot how much I enjoyed it. In fact, I can't wait to run again. Currently I'm just running hear and there when I can, but I'm hoping when I move to Richmond that my brother will help me get in shape, cardio, weight lifts and all.

The next two things I would like to work on is to decrease my intake of refined/processed carbohydrates - breads, biscuits, rice, grains, etc. HOWEVER, if I do choose to eat carbohydrates, they much be from WHOLE GRAINS. Every meal should ideally consist of a meat, vegetable, and one whole grain item.

I also have eaten fastfood about 5 times since January - Arbys 1, Taco Bell 1, Burger King 2, McDonalds 1 - and now I would once again like to continue to give up Fast Food. Maybe even give up French Fries c o m p l e t e l y - yikes, that sounds hard

Blind Melon - Skinned

I'll make a shoehorn outta your shin
I'll make a lampshade of durable skin
And oh, don't you know that I'm always feelin' able
When I'm sittin' home and I'm carving out your navel
im just a sittin' here carving out your navel

When will I realize that this skin I'm in
Hey, it isn't mine
And when will the kill be too much meat for me to hide on

Hey, I could really use a couple of hands
To complete one hell of a plant stand
Oh, and don't you know that I'm caught here in the middle
Making rib cages into coffee tables
I'm just makin' em into coffee tables
And when will I realize that this skin I'm in
Hey, it isn't mine
And when will the thrill be too much meat for me to find anymore

Oh, because you know I can't hide
But oh how hard I try
But this is just the shape I'm in

Although I know I can't hide
But oh how hard I try
But this is just the shape I'm in

Good Names - so not to forget.

Nestles