Tuesday, July 6, 2010


Before I am to go on my travels, I am held in limbo with my family.

Insecurities, self-doubt, and loneliness cloud my thoughts.

My family has been pushing me to do this and that, completely not respecting my decisions and preferences. They believe they know what's best for me, they believe they know what normal is. I ask for them to simply let me do my own thing.

I have also come to recognize my deep-seeded dependency in relationships.

More to add: "I truly appreciate the offer; however, I've already made plans to travel with my best friend, Mr. Blake Berky, to a few festivals myself. I certainly am not as strong of a woman as I appear to be either. While I am pretty damn good at taking care of business, I have a tendency to develop dependencies on my boyfriends that ends up allowing myself to get treated like shit and completely unappreciated.

That being said, the journey I'm about to embark on needs to be done emotionally solo - a quest to gain my independence from relationships as well as a quest for my own sense of spirituality, which I would like to derive without the use of hallucinogens. According to my latest Tarot Card reading, I will be successful in the end, but only as long as a be conscious of my path and the steps that I am taking."