Appreciation for the Dualities

How long will I allow myself to be unappreciated, not only by others but also by myself.

Of course there are traits of my personality and character that need catering and enlightenment; however, I truly have not given myself enough credit - which I believe has contributed greatly to my lack of self-confidence. My lack of self-condifence I attribute to others I love not appreciating what I do for them, my lack of sexuality, the grave disappointment I feel towards my job, and the loss of my temper. However, I can not forget that everyone has downfalls.

I admire those that have acheived some sense of a mental stability and poweress, those that are enlighened; however, these individuals might also lack drive and motivation to contribute to a community. (Is it possible that operating in the real world leads to mental instability?)

I need to focus on the fact that there is balance in every aspect of life - as they are called dualities. For every light there is a dark, for every pessimism there is optimism, dualities exist in EVERY person - and this is the order of life. Rather than strive for happiness by eliminating and suppressing our ego, why not find happiness by simply being conscious that our ego does and will exist and by accepting that the dualities of nature are inevitable. Ideas for "conscious living" would then focus on realizing and controlling the ego, rather than suppressing it.

Realize that I am not whole and complete.

I am almost certaint that there is not one person that is whole and complete, but rather that we are all one and it is through interaction among humanity that makes us complete.

And so returns the concepts of dualities - a grave pessimism followed by a grave optimism.